The Queen's Dwarf

 

Jeffrey Hudson, ironically born in Rutland, the smallest county in England, had an interesting life, at its peak a favourite of Queen Henrietta Maria, falling to the depths of a Barbary slave. Nicknamed Lord Minimus, Hudson was the smallest dwarf in Europe at 18 inches high during childhood and early adolescence. Folklore asserts it was due to his mother choking on a pickled gherkin. 

Luck favoured him at an early age, being gifted to the Duchess of Buckingham when dwarfs were all the rage. Fortune continued to favour him when the Duchess had a wheeze. Entertaining Charles and Henrietta Maria, she served the monarchs a savoury smelling pie, from which popped out the child dwarf dressed in armour and waving a flag. Henrietta was so enamoured of young Jeffrey, the Duke and Duchess presented him as a gift for her ‘amusement.’ 

Known as the Queen’s Dwarf,  he became an instant sensation and was painted by Van Dyke as representing “the most perfect imperfection of nature that ever was born.”*

She almost lost him in 1630 when he was sent to France to fetch Henrietta’s favoured midwife. The ten-year-old Jeffrey caused a sensation and was cuddled and showered with jewels by ladies of the court. Events took a darker turn when, on their way home, he and the midwife were captured by privateers off the coast of Dunkirk. 

She’d lost Jeffrey, her ‘human thumb,’ and the midwife of course. The queen was distraught and moved heaven and earth to effect their release. 

A few years later, she lost him again, this time for good. It may be that an adult and mature Jeffrey had become tired of condescension, whether affectionate or sly. Be that as it may, he made a fatal mistake.

In France with the queen, he fought a duel with the brother of William Croft, another favourite of the queen and captain of her guard. The nobleman in question thought it all a huge joke and charged at Hudson firing a water pistol. Hudson shot him in the head. 

Killing a noble was bad enough; worse, duelling was a capital offence in France. Again, Henrietta pulled strings and his sentence was commuted. He was banished from the country.

He must have breathed a sigh of relief in the Channel and seeing the white cliffs ahead but fate is a tricky beast. He was captured by Barbary pirates and Hudson spent the next twenty-five years as a slave. 

The queen never saw her favourite dwarf again, though she may have unwittingly ransomed him when she paid for the release of a number of English slaves—something she occasionally did as an act of charity. There was, however, no reunion. She died in 1669, the year records show him arriving back home. 

In 1676, and now an old man, he visited a greatly changed London but was arrested for being a Catholic. Released in 1680, he died in relative poverty two years later.  It's a shame he couldn't have lived long enough to see his little green trousers sold for £10,000 a few years back.

 

* In middle age he achieved a growth spurt and reached the height of 3’ 6” Hard labour as a slave in North Africa may have been responsible, though Hudson attributed it to hard buggery by his captors.